Just Like Us!

It's so good to know that Garth Brooks and Dakota Fanning care just as much as we do. And can you believe Joaquin Phoenix does his dishes with his own two hands? Or that Ben Affleck builds doll houses? Really, Ben Affleck builds doll houses.

Tetris

Best YouTube Clip Ever?

This is certainly a contender. It has everything I could ever want from a YouTube clip: gee-whiz behind the scenes magic, funny retro people in funny retro clothing, cheesy 80s jingles, embarrassing marketing choices, genuine "whoa" analog handmade factor that characterizes the best of YouTube, etc.

I remember watching the HBO promo that this clip is about and it was one of those things that gave an impressionable kid way too much to think about. What's beyond the city? The suburbs. What's beyond the suburbs? Only the sky. The world ends there. All that's left is HBO, followed by nothingness. In this promo, the five year old-ish version of me saw the smallness and mortality of humanity. So, to see how it was made, and then to consider that those feelings it gave me are partially a result of the limits of creation in the "primitive" years of highfalutin special effects, was somewhat eye-opening. As great as the promo ended up being, and as impressive as the ingenuity behind it is, when the camera flies through this unmoving world, after the happy couple settles down for a night of HBO watching and caviar, you can't help but notice that there are no moving people or cars in the city. It's like something out of a David Lynch movie- the world stops working when our brains are lost to pay cable. Obviously, this wasn't what HBO was going for, but hey, someone has to read too much into it, right? So much painstaking craft and creative though went into this damn thing (and it's fun to watch this behind the scenes of it because of that), but the ultimate result left me with that creepy 80s vortex feeling that is never desirable. Or maybe it's just disconcerting that the "typical HBO viewers" are painfully white people living in the big city, grinning and wearing the latest in Cape Cod fashions. Everyone I know who watches HBO tends to dress down for TV time.

But more importantly are the songs. The credits read "Illusions" and additional music composed and performed by Jonathan L. Segal. It is my determination that this man is a genius. What does his middle initial stand for? Ludwig? As in Ludwig van Beethoven? When he starts singing "paying closer attention to details" when they're detailing the buildings, I almost died; it was so beautiful. I wrote down some of the lyrics, that so subtly underlines what's really going on in this clip:

Illusion,
keep your eyelids open wide
because the truth may not be what you suppose could be right under your nose,
it's illusion not life!

Thanks Jonathan Ludwig Segal, for showing me the way to understanding this post-modern world.

The Simpsons: E Pluribus Wiggum

One of the better recent episodes. A choice exchange:

Lisa: Ralph can't be president. He's the dumbest person in the slowest reading group
Homer: Lisa, being president is easy; you just point the army and shoot.
Lisa: And Ralph is only 8 years old. It says in the constitution you have to be 35.
Bart: The constitution? I'm pretty sure the Patriot Act killed it to ensure our freedoms.
Homer: Ooo, the patriot act is so terrible, the government might find out what books I take out. What's next? Finding out what operas I go to?
(Homer high-fives Bart.)

Yes yes yes

http://www.salon.com/opinion/kamiya/2008/03/25/rev_jeremiah_wright/

This just about sums it up.

Yauch Doc

Adam Yauch of the Beastie Boys has directed a documentary about the top high school basketball prospects coming together for an all star game at the historic Rucker Park in Harlem. It's all the guys who are starring in college right now and will probably make the leap to the pros next year (Michael Beasley, Jerryd Bayless, etc.). It will be interesting to see how Kevin Love, the prototypical white basketball player and cousin of Beach Boy Mike Love, will fit into all of this...

The 13 year old in me, who was obsessed with the Beastie Boys and basketball and intoxicated by all the extensions of those things (old school hip hop in general, the legends of street ball, New York City) and the vibe where all those things met, is VERY excited for this movie. I'm gonna go play NBA Street and listen to Kurtis Blow.

http://gunninmovie.com/

How to Make a Button

Yeah, so what? Miranda July is as "quirky" and "twee" as they come. I get it. That doesn't mean I can't have a crush on her. Or that this video isn't strangely hilarious.



Also, I really like the design of vbs.tv.

Bicycle

I've been in the market for a bicycle. Something cheap. I found one at Target I took a liking to, but wanted to do some good old fashioned consumer research. So, I read the Amazon user comments for the bike in question. And I found this one:

"Today I bought a Schwinn Danger Ranger (as I like to call it) from a SuperTarget near my work. I rode it home about 8 miles. I am slender but not not very active and falling out of shape. I have not ridden a bike to any consequence since I was a child until today. I selected this vehicle based on its aesthetics and price point. Upon closer inspection I found the presence of numbered gear shifts on the handle bars, front suspension, sporty handle bar things, and the like. I would have expected a bicycle of this caliber to cost more than $140.00. It seems to be assembled correctly as it is functional. They had a silver Schwinn helmet for $15 that I am consuming as well. The ride home inspired me to ride to work on Monday as the ride home took about the same time as the bus I usually take. About thirty seconds into it I didn't think there was a high enough gear, but as I said, I haven't ridden a bike for a while. Even though it's a mountain bike, the gears are plenty high for me and I can't see needing higher unless I am trying to beat traffic downhill. About four fifths of the way home I didn't care what gear I was in because my system shut down and I was working on brain stem functions only. I was having fun, but I was thirsty and I had not had any water. I forgot to buy a bike lock. I also wanted to make choices which would not cause the shiny new Silver Danger Ranger to be stolen. I kept on riding and the brain stem feeling passed as the euphoria kicked in that I was already home. I hope this review helps you choose the right bicycle"

This review did help me choose the right bicycle. Thanks fella.

My dad on YouTube:

"I hear there's a lot of good stuff on there."

We live in the future.

My head hurts:

Thornton Wilder

"The response we make when we "believe" a work of the imagination is that of saying: 'This is the way things are. I have always known it without being fully aware that I knew it. Now in the presence of this play or novel or poem (or picture or piece of music) i know that i know it.'"

Rockets Win 20 Straight

According to ESPN, ancient stone African statue and sometimes Houston Rockets center Dikembe Mutombo made a startling announcement to "nobody in particular" after last night's win against the Hawks: "The Rockets have won 20 games straight. ... All the critics can kiss my black ass." I wasn't aware the Rockets, especially Mutombo (regarded as one of the most open-hearted and loved players in the league) had critics, unless by critics he means "basketball writers who are puzzled that the Rockets can win 20 straight without Yao Ming." Of most concern, however, is Mutombo bringing attention to his "black ass." May this be the only time in my life or yours that anyone acknowledges that Dikembe Mutombo does, indeed, have an ass.

Obama Campaign Becomes Snarky Blogger

http://www.npr.org/blogs/news/2008/03/obama_campaign_skewers_clinton.html

Re: The Daily Show 3/3

I have decided that Hillary Clinton is a grinning bobblehead doll.